4 weeks already. Really? It seems like such a long time ago, and yet when I get to 8 weeks, then 3 months, 4 months, each milestone will seem like a lifetime since Riley was born. I had a moment of joy and happiness, then utter misery this morning. I thought I was ready to have sex with my husband. Well we got all "in the mood" - I was happy and joyful. Then tried. It hurt. I started crying. Then it made me think of Riley and then I started really crying. Not exactly the joyful return to lovemaking you hope it's going to be! And D. was just so understanding and caring. I seriously have the best husband.
I keep looking at the clock waiting for 9.17pm. (it's 8pm now). Will there ever be a Friday night when I don't think of 9.17? At what point to I stop thinking in terms of weeks (Fridays) and it turns to monthly anniversaries (the 26th)? When will the pain in my heart not hurt so much?
Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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